Sunday, June 28, 2009

Celebrity Death Match Takes on New Meaning

Remember those ridiculous animated shows on MTV? Wasn't it some claymation celebrity death match premise? Sheesh....kinda takes on a whole new meaning in light of the string if celebrity deaths we've seen here lately. David, Ed, Farrah, Michael and Billy. Not OJ, though. That murdering freak is still kicking around, but these five are gone. Ed was old, Farrah had cancer but still - actually wait, David was up there in years too. Still, it's odd. The Universe is so fucking random, isn't it? I can believe perhaps, that some things happen for a reason. But not everything. Random rules. Get used to it.

OK that's all I feel like writing for now. I know, weird, right?

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

ENOUGH, Already!!!

Jon & kate...Jon & Kate...Jon & Kate...Jon & Kate....Jon & Kate...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I hear those names ONE MORE TIME I'm going to PUKE!!!
Why is America so fascinated with these two? Any moron can squeeze out 8 kids (as evidenced by that useless turd known as "Octomom"). But these two, who I will hereby refer to as JackAss & Satan's Butthole, not only manage to spawn a ridiculous amount of children in only two pregnancies, but now commence to screw the kids up for life by acting like spoiled children in a sandbox and not enough toys to go 'round. JackAss isn't the worst of the two, but his spineless kowtowing to his wife, Satan's Butthole, isn't setting the best example and frankly, is aggravating the piss out of men and women alike all across the country. I can only imagine the items thrown with ferocious force at thousands of televisions each time Jon, uh, I mean JACKASS is immasculated by that witch's sharp tongue and doesn't smack her down in return. I'm sure, were that to happen, cheers would be heard from households all across America.
Don't EVEN get me started on Satan's Butthole...holy moly, that woman needs to be beaten with a dead fish and then have her head shaved and dipped in raw sewage. What is with that haircut anyway? Perhaps having a family as large as that would drive many of us to distraction, but her OCD is out of control. I'd be willing to bet if you tried to shove a titanium rod up her arse, you would walk away with a bent-as-hell rod and her looking around wondering what that vague feeling in her backside was.
What really irks me now though is this: when the show started it was about the kids, about the family dynamic. Now it's a big load of shit. Celebrity perks, Kate spending most of her days at spas and on vacation. W...T....F????? Jon getting a custom built bike by --gasp!-- other celebrities!!! It's simply ridiculous, the whole shebang.

OK, I'll admit - we only see what the producers choose to show us. We have no idea what goes on when the cameras aren't rolling or what ends up on the cutting room floor. Still, these two boobs are everywhere and it's bugging the shit out of me. They've ruined their marriage, are on the way to sending all 8 of their kids into a lifetime of therapy and by having their names and pictures splashed across every magazine and publication in the country, are pissing us off!!!

How about a show about me and my family? Keep your perks, keep your celebrity status and see how the rest of us REALLY live. We're a helluva lot more entertaining, I'll tell ya that.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Interviews, animal meat and me

Crazy title? I'm feeling bit crazy day, as I do nearly every day so it makes perfect sense. Or doesn't, which means it does. Huh? Yes, I should shut up now before I forget what I was talking about and to who (or is it "whom"?).

ANYWAY, I had an interview today that went rather well. I hit it off with the hiring manager quite nicely and while I think working for her would be pretty cool, I'm not so thrilled with the environment. The work itself, initially sounds like it might be rather monotonous and boring though I believe it would change. Certainly, if nothing else, I would have the chance to learn a whole new skillset but again - the environment is not my ideal. A giant warehouse filled with machinery and large pieces of stuff ( I can't talk about what they do in specifics - I'd like to hold on to my security clearance, thank you very much) with no AC in the summer, a hardhat, safety glasses and steel-toed boots required...ugh. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not such a vain, stuffy girly-girl that I shun the very notion of such accessories. Umm, well OK maybe I do. Let's be honest here. I have a closet chock full of skirts, dresses and frilly tops I've been dying to wear but haven't had the job to wear them to. Now this job comes along - my first interview with the company (and hopefully not my last) and it's not at all what I expected. (sigh)
I'm torn because as I said, the woman I would report to seems very cool and would absolutely have my back and help me grow and move up if that's what I wanted (and it is). It wouldn't be fair of me to accept the job if I have any doubts about whether or not I'd be happy there. I can always apply for other jobs and transfer out within 6 months. She'd be stuck without support and have to go through all the crap of finding another support person. I'd feel like a real tool doing that to her - or to anyone, really. I nearly said as much in my thank you letter to her today. I felt that I should have been up front with her about how on the fence I am, but in the end, decided to just say "thanks" and "it was a pleasure meeting you" and leave it at that. It's quite possible she picked up a "this is not what I expected and oh lordie I don't know if I want this kind of job" vibe from me today and has already eliminted me from her list of possibles. She had excellent things to say about me and paid me some terrific compliments. I would even go so far as to say the job would likely be mine if I were to show sincere enthusiasm for the job and told her flat out that I wanted it. I think I kept a good poker face on, though and tried to hide my surprise when she told me I would not be working in an office but there in the warehouse. I didn't want to take myself out of the running right away because I think it's in my best interest to at least think about it. It would require me to step out of my box and my comfort zone and take on something vastly different than what I am used to. It would also require me to invest in some more jeans, a pair of clunky shoes or boots and resign myself to flatter hair. It would be a dirty job, no doubt. Do I let things like difficulty parking at times & having to walk, no AC (VA summers can truly suck eggs, kids. It can be brutal!) and dressing way down everyday deter me from what could be a really interesting job? It comes down to this: I want to get my foot in the door. I cannot expect to find my ideal job with "the Company" because ideally, that would come once my degree was finished. I can't finish my degree until I get back into the company. So, do I settle? Perhaps, a bit. But then again, maybe I don't have to! I may find a job that is fulfilling and fun and suits me quite nicely! It won't be forever though, because my end goal is not an administrative position. It's in Human Resources - whether that be recruiting, benefits or employee relations. Who knows? I have time to figure that out. Right now my dilemma is - should I get the offer, do I take this position or wait it out and hope I get more interviews and therefore, more offers down the road? Oh, fooey. I hate being in this position! *scratches head, narrows eyes, purses lips* What to do, what to do???

Oh yeah, about the animal meat? Yeah....I made a pork shoulder the other night because I bought it (not sure why) and felt I had to cook it. Plus, it was getting old and in danger of going bad (but it hadn't, yet). Gus enjoyed it, Aiden did too, I ate a little but boy oh boy did I pay for it the next day! My body was not liking it! Cooked chicken to go with dinner last night and gave the boys some - I couldn't touch it. So, though I was questioning whether or not I could stick to this whole vegetarian thing it seems my body is still trying to clue me in to the fact that it is not grooving on the meat. Fish so far is OK. I know, the flyers and material I get from PETA and other sources tell me fish are gentle, curious creatures and they feel pain too. But you know, it's not the killing of animals and consumption of their flesh that bothers me - it's the cycle of life, I suppose (though we can live without it). It's just the way they're killed and treated beforehand. If you were to offer me venison from a deer you'd killed yourself I may eat it. That deer lived it's life in the wild and did it's own little deer things up until the day you put a bullet in it's head. Hopefully you were a good shot and dropped it before it even knew what hit it. Literally. That I can deal with. Perdue, Tyson and whatever big names in beef and pork - y'all can kiss my big white veggie-lovin' arse. Now, now don't go gettin' all offended like - if you're a meat eater I'm not gonna look at you cross-eyed for eating a Tyson chicken pattie. That's your business. I've told you that. We're cool. I'm worried about me right now.

Speaking of moi, I suppose I should address the last category - me. Oh I'm just at that point again - hating myself for the way I look and feel. Well, no that's not completely accurate. I'm mostly OK with how I look. I'd like a little less belly fat and slimmer arms, but that's just so that certain pieces of clothing fit me better. It's mostly the way I feel and the direction I'm headed, health-wise. I won't rehash it all because I've done it a million times already and it's getting old -fast. I'm just looking for that certain something, that one thing that has sent thousands of other people from the couch and the bag of Oreos to the gym and the salad bar. Is it rock bottom? maybe. But I don't want to hit rock bottom! That can be SOOO hard to come back from! I need to find that one thing that motivates me, scares me, gets me going...I know I should do it for Aiden, for ME, for this or that reason. I guess it's not a magic solution - it's not going to come to me all of a sudden. I've been riding this roller coaster for over a decade now and I guess I just want to know when the hell I'm going to be able to get off this ride and stop bitching about it and DO it already? Lose the weight, get in shape. Sounds so simple, and when you strip away all the psychology, excuses and bullshit, it IS ridiculously easy. Eat right. Exercise. Duh. I am my own worst enemy. Isn't it time I made nice-nice with me and got over it already????